Last night I had a dream that I was in Dallas with Olivia and Luis and they were tornado warnings and I needed to get out and drive back to Austin but Olivia was driving and we were about to get stuck in a tornado it was literally like the movie twister and all of these tornadoes came out of nowhere and we couldn’t escape we somehow made it back to my house my childhood house in Charlotte that was now in Dallas and sitting in the living room we watched a tornado destroy my pool house and I was devastated. Then we were all trying to hide from the tornadoes in Olivia‘s new house which was my old apartment it was so wild and makes absolutely no sense but it was perfectly understandable in my dream I was so mortified and scared I woke up in a cold sweat.

Jump to the next dream where I met Kim Kardashian when she picked me up from a weird situation where I was in the desert or something and then she drove me to my house to change for this party we were headed to. I changed then sat outside on a bench for a while before realizing Kim and her entourage and like half of her children were waiting for me in their convertible escalade that had like 20 seats; it was basically a limo.

She took me and Russell and a couple other people to a pool party and Kourtney Kardashian looked like a piece of trash. I was dancing with Russell but all these WEIRDOS kept coming up to us like they didn’t have teeth or anything it was bizarre. Then I went in to the bathroom (as I often do in my dreams) and these girls were freaking out because they just took acid but also got hired by the club to start that same day and they were worried they would have to work the same room together and wouldn’t be able to do it because they would be cracking up from the acid the whole time. Then the bathroom got all trippy and there were stacks of books on top of all of the toilets and there was a cat running around…

And then I entered my third and final dream of the evening where Puff was running around a park or something and throwing up HUNDREDS of WHOLE Forrero Rocher chocolates; gold foil wrapper and all. They didn’t even look eaten other than the fact they were a little slobbery.

I woke up craving chocolate.

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